1. Negative Self-Talk
If you are reading this post, then I know that you are a GREAT mom. You care, you’re trying and yet you still are riddled with feeling like you suck. Stop that.
As women, our internal dialogue can be so deteriorating to ourselves. The narrative that we speak about ourselves is ultimately what we will believe for ourselves. This is why it’s so important to speak goodness and truth over one another. You are doing better than you think. You are significant, you are in the right place and you are more than enough for whatever it is that is placed in front of you.
As a female culture, we need to stop the negative self-talk. Your body looks amazing – especially if it has miraculously yo-yo’d up and down to carry children, or several children. Whether that was six months ago, or 16 years ago. My kids see my stomach and tell me my belly is squishy and instead of covering back up in shame, I let them. I relish the fact that my journey included being able to carry them in my own body. Sure, I hated most every minute of being pregnant but I LOVE that my body was able to do it. It’s left me with INSANE stretch marks and “softness” that hasn’t gone away despite how many barre classes I take (or don’t take).
Stop living in the land of not your current reality and begin speaking the same positive narrative for yourself that you would for your children. Be proud of your accomplishments. Champion your own abilities and freedoms. Right feelings will follow right actions. Stop the negative self talk, and start pushing truths of affirmation until you believe it to be true.
2. Being a Slave To Your Circumstances
Nap time, snack time, pick up, drop off, it can all be so much! Especially as we gear up to close out the school year and we’ve got performances and displays and extra curriculars out the butt – I get it! But instead of getting bogged down in the monotony of what is seemingly Groundhog’s day in your land of motherhood, we need a perspective shift.
You may not always be able to change your circumstances – if you have school age kids, there is no going around the activities that are required for your student to participate in most of the time. And unfortunately, they do need to do the same basic things every day like shower, brush their teeth (even though they fall out!) and eat three meals.
But, we can make a conscious mindset shift. Create a fun playlist on your iPod (I am not above drowning out the children while you handle life). Scrap the responsibilities for the day – play hooky, skip baseball, go out to dinner instead of hustling to make picnic dinner on the go at the baseball field for the third time this week. Get a babysitter to do the bedtime routine! Your schedule should be serving you, not the opposite – you can always try something new. Don’t be afraid to take control of your circumstances as much as you are capable and get your mind right. There is freedom in choices, so remember that ultimately you are in control of your family’s schedule and happenings (for the most part), and stop being a slave to your circumstances. I wrote about the importance of investing in self-care and this falls directly in this same category.
Okay I know we hear this all the time, but good Lord, it is a lesson that needs to be front and center for me every day.
Stop comparing your insides to someone else’s outsides. You see their outside on social media, at the school play, while they pleasantly picnic at the park, as you walk by their house at night and then you compare it to your insides. THIS IS NOT RIGHT. The reality is that you have no idea what is really going on inside of them. You just know what’s going on inside of you.
I know that you feel like a mess, I’m chiming in with a ‘ME TOO’ on that one!
But EVERYONE is a mess. Stop comparing their best moment with your worst. You are doing better than you think and until you stop comparing, you won’t begin to believe that is true for you.
If you consciously think through these three things, and taking inventory of what you can legit quit today, I believe that you will come out the other side of parenting today as the sane, joy-filled woman that I know you want to be. Stop comparing, stop being a slave to your circumstances, and for goodness sake quit that negative self talk.
If you felt encouraged by today’s post, will you please go ahead and share it with a friend?! There is nothing more powerful than a girlfriend recommendation!
You can also follow along on Instagram where I am usually sharing my unfiltered happenings of the day. I’m just a regular mom out in the suburb streets like you, tackling the task of raising the next generation on the daily without losing my mind.