Lonely Mom, I see you.
I see those little people that are surrounding your ankles and legs all day. I hear those incessant requests for snacks, and help, and ‘look at me’ and the never-ending ‘do this’. It is the soundtrack of your life. You dreamed of this job, yet here you are, feeling lonely and like you want to escape.
You are emotionally drained. And wiped. You haven’t had a real conversation in week’s. Your boobs might be leaking and your muffin top might be pudgy. And now swimsuit season is upon us. Awesome.
The perfect day right now sounds a lot like silence. Most likely by yourself. But then you feel guilty for wanting time alone. Don’t.
You need rest.
And more than physical rest, you need soul rest. And soul rest oftentimes comes in the form of connection. Even though our instincts tell us to retreat, what we really need to do is lean in to the hard days when it feels the loneliest, and find a way to connect.
The antidote to loneliness is connection.
Connect with a friend. Connect with God. Connect yourself to the world around you. Connect yourself to the story happening despite the fact that your littles aren’t napping.
This work is so hard. It is so lonely. But it is so good and worth it. I often have to say those things out loud in order for me to believe it. And there are plenty of days when even after saying them out loud, I still don’t believe it.
Keep connecting anyway.
Newt Gingrich (random, I know) once said:
Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the work you already did
Yep, that sounds like being a mom. Doing the same work again and again. Don’t let that bitterness grow in you while you sweep the crumbs for the 50th time. Catch yourself in those moments and recognize your need to connect. Something that will snap your attention away from the circumstances and connect you to the bigger purpose.
The tantrums, fevers, constant whining and nap strikes are par for the course. We need to find connection and joy despite these long days. And in the midst of them. It can be done.
We do it by connecting.
Lonely Mama, I see you. I know you crave conversation, and silence, and someone else to make dinner tonight. It probably won’t happen. So instead, take 10 minutes today to connect. Connect to your Creator, your neighbor, your soul. And I promise your load will feel lighter.
Keep on keepin’ on. We got this!